Talking but saying empty words?
Hearing but unable to comprehend?
Walking but you feel like you’re more like crawling?
Breathing but hurting each time you grasp the air?
Smiling but feeling sadder by the minute?
Whispering but hearing yourself screaming?
Well, hello there?!
YOU ARE NOT ALONE. :((((
One of the few statements that are easier said than done.
I always love to think that I’m strong enough to walk away from the person that makes my heart thump in the most special way, but I can’t.
It’s as if everytime I try to take that one step forward, a thought would just suddenly hit me and would remind me how good it really feels to have him near.
Outstanding feeling. That’s the best that I could come up whenever i’m with him.
Though I usually get hurt by just being with him, the hurt wouldn’t still be compared to the bliss that I get by just being able to hold his hand and see his smile.
He’s one perfect thing that I never wanted to lose.
NEVER.
It hurts big time that I don’t know if I could still endure but…
It feels like, I have to walk now.
Or maybe I should start crawling?!
Again, it’s really hard, I may not be able to do it, but I have to.
I must.
I should.
I will.
Soon. </3
Where am I standing at this point of time?
Uhmnnn.. Maybe on the giving up part.
I’ve waited for quite some time now for him to do
good menial steps to win me back and
to prove that I made the wrong decision of walking alone,
but I guess, i’m done with waiting for those bold proofs.
I really thought that he’ll be more of a man this time but he never did try.
Now i’m down to letting the memories be memories and regrets be regrets.
Honestly, for me, It’s more of a feeling of remorse than a feeling of fulfillment that I am having but time would come that reasons will find its final ground.
Note to self: You will be loved. :’(
Bearable but hard. VERY. :(
Never did I wish to be in this situation. But if time comes that i will be,
I’ll close my eyes and walk away.
Sometimes, it’s better to stay in denial than opening your eyes to something that would give you an excruciating pain.
Yes, it isnt healthy., but who says you’ll stay on that perspective forever?
You deny yourself from the pain until the pain becomes more obscure, then you sensitize yourself bit by bit.
(Source: lovequotesrus)
God is the greatest comforter anyone could have.
Before you can even say a thing and before you could sigh a single breath, GOD already knows what you are feeling.
I know that I a weak and I can do nothing by myself, but with GOD, I am strong and I will be able to ace all challenges.
GOD’s economy of mercy and grace is never bankrupt.
It’s always ample and great.
Believe and have faith in our Mighty GOD.
He knows best; He’ll keep you strong. :)
Never let anyone decide for you.
You have a mind and a heart of your own.
Always be guided by GOD’s Word and wisdom in making choices and decisions.
Don’t decide based on impulse and don’t let others think for you.
You and GOD alone are the most adept beings that would really muster of how great you can tolerate and how far you can run.
BE GUIDED WHILE CHOOSING THE THINGS THAT”LL MAKE YOU BLISSFUL. :)
I usually do this. Usually but not always.
You see, i’m a super jolly person and I do love socializing. I barely keep quiet and almost, if not all, of my friends call me loud. :)
But when i’m depressed, wherein I am a bit always lately, everyone notices that i’m feebler and quieter. I barely speak. When I eat, I nibble a few chews and drink a lot.
People that knows me well notices it but I always say this excuse: “I’M JUST TIRED.”
For me, there’s really no sense in saying and sharing all those toting burdens that I am experiencing because I know they wouldn’t understand it fully and I dont want the people around me to feel likewise.
That’s just how I am. Problems and depressions pass. It’s not like they’re there forever. :) So might as well, COPE with it… ALONE> :)
…alone with GOD. :)
About me
A girl from the background. A lady with that half-wit smile. A person that only knows the grueling drudgery of boloney ideas.DIANE.but that was what they think they know.
I must tell you, you must know me well.
I'm always compelled to make myself break through as cheerful and sunny at all times. It's not because i like to please people or to gain a couple of new friends and acquaintances. NO.
Actually it had been my favorite reflex. I don't know why but in all aridity and poignant situations, I feel that I have this menial task of keeping everyone and everything at ease, or at least, normal.
Maybe it's because I, myself, know how it feels to lament, to be lonely, and even to be depressed. At a vernal age, I had been flogged down with many crucial and complex predicaments and finding a good human back-up is almost impossible, yet at times, achievable.
I am obliged to stop heavy tears and harsh words for the sake of keeping an argument short and for keeping a good testimony of prudence.
It's not easy. It sure is punishing, but by God's grace, i endured.
It's never easy to force a smile and make-believe you're okay, when in fact you want to rally and cry all those toting burdens you're carrying and just lay them upfront the person that's failed and neglected you.
It's never easy to say "You've been forgiven," and delete all those despicable acts that was done. It's never easy to embrace the person that once loosen his grip on probity and honor.
It never is. It will never be.
Yes, no one should be coerced to forgive, to forget, to accept, and to embrace all those things, but could you not do that to someone who also had forgave, forgot, accepted, and embraced you when you did something unpardonable?
Many people are facing their own dilemmas and I know you, too, are one of them. Everyone of us are. But it doesn't mean we should whine or feel sorry about ourselves. Either wont help.
In a lecture way back in college, a professor taught me a philosophy that i'll always live-through.
Her philosophy? PROGRAMMING.
You program yourself to be someone you want to become. You rule over yourself and that goes with your emotions as well. You dominate them, not the other way around. When you're feeling down, tie in to activities that'll lift your spirit up.
Live a life. Doll up. Have an endless smile. Talk to your problems and tell them how God is way way bigger than they are. Shout Amen. Pray. Jump. Sing. Write. Read. Be humane.
PROGRAMMING. :)
See? Not all retard-looking people are birdbrains and scatterbrains! Their hearts are not empty.
So the next time you bump into someone jolly and care-free, remember:
THEIR SMILES AND LAUGHTERS DON'T DEFINE THEM.
They may actually look like a dingbat or a riff raff, but hey.. don't judge!
It may seem moronic to consider, but it's always worth it to be empathic and think that maybe, just maybe, their facing their own battles through that cheery line.
-Diana Carla Sena; June 18, 2011; 21:07.
